Wednesday, October 20, 2010

NFL TO BAN DISTURBING “HEAD SHOTS”

(October 20, 2010) --- "We cannot and will not tolerate what we saw last Sunday," said NFL vice president of operations Ray Anderson. "We've got to get the message to players that these upsetting head-shots will be met with a very necessary higher standard of accountability for such offensive and deliberate shots."

Brett Favre: In favor of head-shots.
When NFL commissioner Roger Goodell first witnessed those head-shots last week, he said he cringed and then threw-up a little in his mouth. Anderson said he had to use 20-bottles of Visine to bleach his eyes and then had to pull out that part of his brain with an oyster fork so he could soak it in ammonia.

Needless to say, the league had seen enough and said it is taking immediate action.

The NFL has announced, effective this weekend, even first-time offenders will face fines and suspensions for disturbing head-shots, the ones that could very possibly lead to long term brain damage.

But some in the league disagree. In fact, veteran quarterback Brett Favre says he’s taken dozens of head-shots over the years and thinks it’s no big deal. Even some Vikings fans think that such head shots are harmless and only lead to uncontrollable snickering.

NFL referee Ed Hochuli was called in to revue Favre's head shot to see if there was a penalty such as encroachment, taunting, illegal use of hands, ineligible member or possibly using a helmet as a weapon.
The NFL’s tough new rules came out of the league’s investigation into the disturbing head shots Favre allegedly texted to reporter Jenn Sterger when both were employed by the New York Jets two years ago.

“I would rather have witnessed Clay Matthews stick his hand into an opposing quarterback’s chest, pull out his heart, take a bite, sack him for a 30-yard loss and give him a football transplant before ever seeing what I saw between Favre’s legs.”

Anderson said he was only reviewing the evidence when he was exposed to the picture. "We're talking about life-altering circumstances here. Sadly, I’ll never be able to get that likeness of that little Mississippi pee-pee out of my head. We just can’t let anything like that ever happen again in the NFL.”

In related news, the state of Wisconsin has updated its pornography laws which now make it illegal for anyone to possess images of Mike Ditka’s face.